Happy New Year!
It’s 2017 and you know what that means. It’s time for #newyearnewme declarations and making new year’s resolutions. I jumped on the bandwagon and thought hard about all of the things I wanted to change or accomplish this year. I had a long and detailed list of to-dos last year, yet I checked off less than a handful of them.
I started to write another laundry list of goals for this year, but then one of my FB friends shared this image in a group chat and it resonated with me:
Eureka! This is clearly an area of my life that I struggle with. I give so much of myself to others, especially in relationships. But I have been pouring from an empty cup. I decided that since I usually bite off more than I can chew each year, that this year I would only have one resolution – to love myself more.
When I was an elementary school Music Teacher, I taught my third graders (they were unbelievably talented at such a young age) a song by Jordin Sparks, One Step At A Time:
You wanna show the world, but no one knows your name yet
Wonder when and where and how you’re gonna make it
You know you can if you get the chance
In your face as the door keeps slamming
Now you’re feeling more and more frustrated
And you’re getting all kind of impatient waiting
We live and we learn to take
One step at a time
There’s no need to rush
It’s like learning to fly
Or falling in love
It’s gonna happen when it’s
Supposed to happen and we
Find the reasons why
One step at a time
In teaching them that song, I encouraged them to not rush through life because that is often how we make mistakes. I was reminded of this when the new year started. I tend to be a jack of all trades and a master of none. I am always doingthemost.com. I chase so many goals every year. The end result is usually less than desired.
I start a new diet, or a strenuous fitness regimen, only to get lazy by mid-year and regain the weight I lost. I declutter my apartment, my desk at work, or even my wallet, yet will slack off and let things get disorganized again. I keep a journal and write more, but then get distracted and become inconsistent. I vow to only deal with people that give as much as they take, but end up settling for less than I deserve.
So this year, I want to apply a more specific approach. Everything I do has to stem from a place of self-love. I will hold myself accountable and ask “Does this reflect the love I have for myself?” If the answer is “No”, then I can’t do it. It won’t be easy, but it’s necessary.
If I operate with love, then I will be more likely to do something as small as walk past the tray of cookies in the kitchen at work (#nottodaysatan). Or something as crucial as not waste my time with people that don’t have my best interest at heart. More importantly, I won’t settle for mediocrity in any part of my life – work, finances, health, etc. I will stop talking about changing something and will just do it. I won’t let fear and self-doubt keep me from being successful. How? I will love myself enough to want the best for me.
I am a work in progress. I’m not where I want to be yet, but I am blessed to not be where (and who) I used to be. If I take one step at a time and focus on loving me, everything else should fall into place.